Do you wonder why you never feel satisfied with anything? Sometimes it seems like no matter what you do, experience, achieve, or buy, it’s never enough.
Do you feel like you’re always chasing that next thing? A personal goal, a new product, getting your dream job, finding the right partner, or starting a family.
But once you get it, do you find yourself already thinking about your next desire? Do you never feel content with what you have? Are you always looking ahead, instead of enjoying the steps you take?
In this article, I’m going to talk about why you feel this way, and what you can do to change it.
We’re Constantly Drip Fed That It’s Never Enough
Ever since early childhood you’ve been told nothing is ever enough. By whom? Advertisements, teachers, parents, society, and social media, and even yourself.
Think about it. We’ve been drip fed these messages throughout our whole lives. It’s never ending.
Adverts subliminally target us none stop. Telling us that we need this new piece of technology, product, appliance, car, house, and so on. In fact, entire industries’ success depends on people wanting more and more.
As we grow up, if we decide to study further, our school is replaced with university, then we go into the working world. Lecturers replace our teachers, until we have a boss looking over us.
The bar gets raised higher and higher. We need to get good enough grades throughout our education to get the careers we want. All whilst competing with others.
I’m not saying that it’s all doom and gloom. Your experience may be different. But for many, the pressures of this system can become too much.
On top of that we have unlimited access to the internet and social media. Here we can relentlessly compare our appearance, relationships, wealth, and success to others.
Is it any surprise then that we’re never satisfied with anything? Our poor brains can’t keep up.
It’s easy to feel overwhelmed with what kind of body, house, partner, family, career, and material wealth you should have.
Be mindful of that IV drip feeding you. Or the one you’re feeding yourself with.
Unrealistic Expectations and Perfectionism
You could also be feeling this way because you have unrealistic expectations. Is anything you do ever good enough? Or do you find you can never reach your unattainable standards?
As a self-confessed perfectionist, I know all too well about this kind of mindset.
If this sounds like you, I’d suggest reading my article about perfectionism. Here I explain how to change your mindset and redefine your goals.
Let’s now look at some ways to find enjoyment in the process, rather than always feeling unhappy in the present.
Enjoy the Journey
Yes, I know. It’s such a cliché but we must learn to enjoy the journey. Why? Because we never arrive. Sorry to say it, but there will always be things to do, learn, acquire, and achieve.
But would you want it any other way?
Imagine if you did get everything your heart desired. Then what? Let’s say you had unlimited money. You could you buy an island, build a private resort, and spend the rest of your days drinking a cocktail on a beach.
Would you be happy and fulfilled? Or do you think overtime you’d grow bored and look for something new to do?
This happens to the wealthiest people on the planet. They never stop yearning to buy the next thing to outdo their peers. The world becomes their playground. They unlimited options, making it even harder to ever feel satisfied.
I’m sure you’ve noticed this yourself. You met your goal. You bought that new car. You got that promotion. But did it bring you true happiness? Could you then sit back and enjoy it? Maybe you could for a few days or weeks, but then onto the next thing, right?
There’s nothing wrong with being ambitious and striving to reach goals. I’m much the same and always looking to self-improve. But if we can’t enjoy the process, what’s the point? It starts to feel tedious and meaningless.
How can you enjoy the journey then?
“Life is about accepting the challenges along the way, choosing to keep moving forward, and savoring the journey.”
— Roy T. Bennett
Learn to Live in the Present
The best way to do so is to focus on the here and now. The reason you feel unsatisfied is because you’re always looking to the future. We often think to ourselves ‘when I do, gain, achieve, or buy x, then I’ll be happy’.
Sound familiar?
We get so caught up focussing on the next desire, that we completely forget to enjoy the present. How can you learn to live in the here and now? That’s where mindfulness practice and meditation can help.
In mindfulness, you learn to pay attention to your feelings, sensations, and senses. All whilst developing your own self-awareness. You begin to recognise and understand the workings of your mind and body better.
Find out more about the practice in my article ‘What is Mindfulness?‘.
Cultivate Gratitude
It’s very easy to dwell on what you don’t have. But why not focus on what you DO have?
The best way to practice gratitude is to write down the things you’re grateful for. Whether that be your health, family, a relationship, where you live, what you already own etc.
Even better, express the gratitude you feel towards someone. Tell them that you love them or admire their personality. Let them know you appreciate their friendship. That you value their time, energy, loyalty, empathy, and support.
Not only will you feel good, but it will brighten up their day.
“Enjoy the little things, for one day you may look back and realize they were the big things.”
— Robert Brault
You Can Find Contentment on the Path
I hope this article has given you some insight about why you never feel satisfied. I’ve also given you some ideas about how to find content on the path. Instead of always waiting to feel complete in a future moment that never seems to arrive.
Remember it’s great to be ambitious and driven, but it’s just as important to find pleasure and peace in the present.
What’s the last thing you did, acquired, or bought that you thought would bring you more fulfilment in your life? I’d love to find out in the comments.
Take care of yourselves,
Chris from Mindful Way to Be
